The Wolf Report has learned that a new medical plan, called "The GSD Plan" is gaining bipartisan support within both the House and Senate. Observers believe that it may represent the kind of new thinking that can bring the nation together on this divisive issue.
"This is the one plan that meets both the goals of the President, of liberals who want universal health care, and of fiscal conservatives who don't want an exploding national debt," said Jim Beam, who heads the Committee for the GSD Plan. "The GSD Plan can provide health care to every American, without exception, and can do so at lower costs than any other plan being considered. Furthermore it's a tried and true plan, one that millions of people--rich and poor alike--have used successfully. All we've done is to formalize the plan, give it a name, and spend $250 million dollars lobbying for its adoption.
GSD, which stands for "Get Sick and Die," was the medical plan chosen by George Washington, John Adams, Thomas Jefferson, and almost all of the other Founding Fathers. Today it's the plan that covers millions of Americans, most of whom believe that they don't have a health care plan. "In fact," says Beam, "they are covered by the plan that the richest and most powerful people in this country used until recently. People need to realize that they have this great coverage, and then maybe stop whining and shut up."
Some critics believe that GSD will not provide good health care, But Beam disagrees. "GSD provides excellent care. George Washington died at age 67, Thomas Jefferson at 83 and John Adams at 90, to name just a few people who used GSD. I'd say that's a pretty good record."
According to Beam, the GSD that the Founding Fathers enjoyed has been improved to take advantage of the latest medical research. Bleeding and blistering will no longer be covered. Healing with crystals will be reimbursed, but with a $10.00 co-pay.
